franken-coleman-court.thumbnail.jpgOne of the big mysteries among local legal professionals here in the Twin Cities is why, exactly, Norm Coleman picked Joe Friedberg, whose going rate is reputedly $1200 an hour, to run the visible portion of the contest trial. Friedberg, the head trial lawyer for Norm’s contest and the sole remaining local guy in the Coleman camp who’s allowed to talk to the media, is great at tugging the heartstrings of jurors with no legal knowledge (as StarTribune columnist Nick (no relation) Coleman explains with the ‘blueberry pie’ story), but at no point in the contest will civilian jurors play a part:  The contest is playing out before a three-judge panel, and even the appeals that Norm’s sure to be making will play out before judges, not jurors.

Then again, this all makes sense if Friedberg’s main goal is not to win the case, but to waste time and put on a show for the folks outside the courtroom (and to rack up those billable hours — I seriously doubt he’s doing this pro bono). 

If that’s the case, Friedberg’s gotta be happy.  The StarTribune, the most prestigious local paper, did exactly what Friedberg wanted them to do — which was to focus mostly on one particularly heart-tugging witness, 75-year-old legally-blind Gerald Anderson, as opposed to Douglas Thompson (Mister Got-My-Girlfriend-To-Forge-My-Name) and Wesley Briest (the 88-year-old gentleman who at first insisted he’d voted at the polls but then was shown an absentee ballot envelope he’d signed).   Forget about the botched ballot copies we’d submitted as evidence!  Forget about the guy confessing to ballot fraud!  Just focus on the poor old legally blind fella!   (Granted, the Franken people did some of this too back in the early phases of the recount, but that was for people who’d cast "fifth-pile" absentee ballots — ballots that were illegally rejected as opposed to repeatedly legally rejected.

Mark my words:  If Friedberg could put puppies on the witness stand, he would.  Probably Irish water spaniel puppies, though Cavalier King Charles spaniels are also in the running.